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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Teacher can I be your pet? 2

BB Convo Participants … Mena, Annoying  Married Chick and Iyawo Peanut Boy

Mena: Hi guys. Guess what?  I’m stuck in training all day.

AMC: We don’t care. Abi did we tell u we wanted to c u? Just had breakfast and still hungry. Think I’m going to make jollof rice so bugger off.

Mena: Charming as always sister dearest. I see pregnancy hasn’t improved your surly attitude.

AMC: *Raspberry*

Mena: Ireti.  Anyway u’ll never guess what just happened?

AMC: Don’t care. Need food. Need light. Need to live on the island *Crying*

IPB: I care. Tell me all. I am eager and ready to listen as I’m channeling tranquil vibes and I’m at peace with the universe *Big Smile*

My family members sure know how to pick em. Like we’re not crazy enough on our own; we have to marry and breed with other loopy people.

Mena: Hey IPB. Was just about to tell sis here that the trainer on my course is pretty darn cute. At least he was until I saw him picking his nose. Have totally lost interest now.

AMC: Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Where do you find all these dodgy blokes from?  You better run before you discover he eats his toe nail clippings too or even worse he likes to watch YOU eat them before he can play mummies and daddies…hahahahahahahahahaha

Mena: You have brain touch AMC. Please stop talking trash around my unborn niece/nephew

IPB: Am I missing something here? Unless he actually ate the bogey after picking his nose, then I don’t see the problem. Men are like puppies, they can be trained to behave appropriately in polite company.

AMC: Train wetin? I beg Mena don’t listen to her. Such men cannot be trained and even if you could make him to behave in public, you just know some perky breasted, twenty something year old will now see his potential and steal him off you.

IPB: AMMMMCCCCCCCCC! I’m really not impressed with the negative vibes you’re bringing into this chat. I think we should take a moment to cleanse the air by sending each other loving comments. I’ll start…I think I’m very lucky to be surrounded by women who are beautiful both outside and in *Hug*

AMC: Kiss my arse *Raspberry*

Mena: Ladies please! Now let’s all be civil. AMC you’re being a tad melodramatic. I think IPB is right. He’s too hot to let a lil’ thing like unsanitary habits get in the way of true love. I shall mould him into my dream man.

AMC: Afi mould. IPB my sister is no spring chicken and does not have the time to be doing an Eliza Doolittle on razz boys.  Mena you better close your eyes and marry him like that. At your advanced stage in life you don’t have time to be picky. The only deal breaker would be skid marks and if you’re a good Christian girl like  you claim, you will not discover those until after it’s too late…hahahahahahahaha

IPB: Mena ignore her. You might not be young and perky anymore but you don’t have to sell yourself short.

Mena: Wow IPB! Thanks. Just what every woman wants to hear *Sarcy Face*

AMC: *ROTFL* I beg you people don’t kill me. All this laughing is making me want to pee.

Mena: I don’t know why I bother telling you lot anything. Go away jo. I’m going back to pretending to be interested in the training. I HATE U ALL!!!! *Raspberry*

IPB: You see what you’ve done AMC? You’ve upset her.

AMC: Me Ke? Miss Congeniality 2007 at NYSC camp. I don’t think so. I think it’s your reference to age and drooping body parts that has upset her.

IPB: Mena are you still there? Don’t be mad. I apologise for both AMC and myself.

AMC: Speak for yourself o. I haven’t done anything. Only telling the truth.  Tick, tock…

Mena: What’s your point exactly? That just because I’m somewhere in my early 30’s I need to marry whatever frog comes my way?

IPB: Early 30's???? Sister please!!!!!

AMC: Pretty much. Men are scarce. Get what you can…Bogey eater or not.

IPB: Well not any frog. We draw the line at potential wife beaters, okada drivers and people who already have wives. Everyone else is game *Big Smile*

Mena: I rebuke such. I have a list of wants and I intend to stick to them.

AMC: *Sigh* I’ve heard your wants and let me just tell you that you go wait tire.

Mena:  *Talk to the hand*

IPB: Look Mena, the sad reality is the guys your age want to marry twenty year olds and the ones older than you are all already married. So we need to put things into perspective. You were obviously initially attracted to him so forget his dodgy etiquette skills for a minute and get to know him better. You might find you can live with the annoying quirks.

AMC: She get choice? Look you’re starting to embarrass the family. Just lure one home already will ya?

IPB: Hey are you still there? 


No!  I’m not there actually because while all this frantic bbing has been going on, Tall Drink of Chocolate has moved from his perch at the back of the class and was now pulling up a chair to sit beside me.

“You’re not paying attention” he says looking at my bb and then back at me with a smile.

“I am. I’m multi-tasking” I say with a giggle, fluttering my eyelashes.

He’s gorge and he doesn’t have a local accent. So what if he likes to stick his finger up his hooter? No ones perfect.

Forget the local accent. He just touched our arm. HE’S FLIRTING WITH US MENA. PRAISE THE LORD! Our first flirt of 2011. If he’s remotely attracted to us without make up, I say he’s a keeper.

Calm down Brain lets not be too hasty.  But I do think you’re right.

For the next couple of hours Tall Drink of Chocolate kept going back and forth between me and the rest of the class. By the end of the course I’d discovered that he’d lived in the Middle East for a couple of years but was thinking of coming back to Las Gidi…Result.  

He hasn’t mentioned any wife, kids, serious relationships but I guess Strategic Training isn’t the place for that especially since all he’s done is flirt. A serious offer of intent is yet to be made.  

As I slowly walked towards him to say goodbye, I hoped and I prayed that he would give me some sort of sign that he was into me.

He did…A little white card with his number and the 4 little words every girl longs to hear “Make sure you call.”


Abi said...

Don't lose sleep over this guy o.. a guy that gives you his number, to me, is not that interested, or maybe he is but probably for a booty call....Thats my view, if he was interested then he should have asked for your number...

Gee said...

I second what Abi said oh, which kind , make sure you call?